Celebrating Dolly Parton: Lessons in Authenticity, Empathy, and Self-Worth

“The best books last forever, as you must, Dolly--/ bringing together cowboys and drag queens dressed as Dolly / Appalachian Pride and LGBTQ Pride side by side…Your authenticity fluttered fake eyelashes, Dolly / and I wanted to see the world as you saw it. Dolly, / I feel the room swaying.  Promise you’ll never god away, Dolly.”

                                                           -“Dolly Parton Ghazal”-Denise Duhamel & Julie Marie Wade

 One month ago we lost Dolly Parton. Her passing, in the midst of such uncertain and turbulent times, was disquieting and felt deeply unfair. For many of us, Dolly Parton had always been a part of our lives, and seemed like a collective bargain with the universe. Yes, the universe told us, life is going to be hard, and yes, sometimes it will feel like more than we can take. However, in exchange for the difficulties, we were gifted the radiant and sublime Dolly Parton.

On August 25, 2026, the universe reneged on its agreement with us. The gift of Dolly was replaced by profound grief. This grief was felt across the globe, by an unfathomable number of people, mostly strangers to each other. In our mourning, strangers were temporarily forged into a community bonded by this shared grief. In today’s fractious world, the ability to unite folks from different religions, cultures, classes, races, sexualities, genders, and bitterly divided political beliefs is extraordinary. That is one of Dolly’s many gifts we are celebrating today.

In numerous cities, towns, businesses, and even one state, California, today, September 25, or 9-2-5, has been declared Dolly Parton Day. Chrysalis Center for Counseling would like to add our name to the multitudes celebrating Dolly and her rich legacy.  We celebrate not the music, movies, or products, but the person and path she built for us to follow. Civil rights activist Bayard Rustin once said, “God does not require us to achieve any of the good tasks that humanity must pursue. What God does require of us is that we not stop trying.” Dolly lived a life actively pursuing so many of those good tasks.

Dolly was fiercely authentic. When she told people to “Find out who you are and do it on purpose,” she did the same thing. She loved enormous blonde hair, dazzling rhinestones, long red nails, and so many things folks considered tacky. When folks poked fun, she reminded them, “just because I’m blonde, don’t think I’m dumb, because this dumb blond ain’t nobody’s fool,” and never changed. And no matter her fame, she never truly left Appalachia. Instead of hiding (in her words) her “hillbilly upbringing,” she sang songs and told stories that proclaimed the virtues and wonders of her home. Let’s celebrate Dolly by finding ways to be more authentic in an A.I. world.

Dolly took giant risks and was brave. She wore her “Coat of Many Colors” proudly, even as others laughed.  She left home at 18, with a paper bag and dream. In 1974, when she was finally experiencing success on the Porter Wagner Show, she didn’t rest on her laurels.  Dolly set off on her own, tackling a country music world that was uncompromising to “girl singers,” and was a phenomenon. She took roles in movies opposite imposing actors, and became a movie star. That first movie, 9-5, led to her eventually writing a Broadway musical. Let’s celebrate Dolly by taking one of those risks we have been afraid to take.

Dolly Parton exuded humor, never failing to land jokes about herself before anyone else could. She was frequently offered wry takes on her outsized looks, telling us “how expensive it was to look this cheap,” and remarking, “It's a good thing I was born a girl, otherwise I'd be a drag queen.” When a teenager in an audience Q & A asked her what advice she would give to young people, she quipped, “Act like its raining everyday and wear your rubbers.” On a whim, she famously entered a Dolly Parton look-alike contest. She lost, to drag queens, but never failed to laugh when she retold the story. In a world filled with such acrimony, let’s work to laugh as much as Dolly

She practiced radical forgiveness. When she left the Porter Wagner show in 1974,
Wagner sued her. Instead of a bitter court trial, she paid him one million dollars, the first million she earned, which was no small amount in 1979. Later in life, when Wagner was sick and facing financial hardship, Parton secretly purchased his music catalog. Along with the money he received from the sale, Dolly gave the rights to the catalog to his family. She wanted his family to be cared for and wanted to thank him for helping her get her start in country music. Let’s celebrate Dolly by practicing more forgiveness.

She was exuberantly generous. Dolly’s generosity was legendary. Her first big purchase was not for her. Instead, she bought her parents a house. She created the Imagination Library and put 330 million free books into the hands of kids. In 2016, she created the My People Fund to provide families who lost their homes to fires in East Tennessee with $1,000 a month for six months, eventually donating over twelve million dollars. In 2020 she donated a million dollars to Covid vaccine research. In 2020, she personally contributed one million dollars toward the Hurricane Helene relief efforts in East Tennessee, matched by an additional one million from her local businesses and the Dollywood Foundation. And that was the tip of the iceberg. Let’s celebrate Dolly by finding ways we can be more generous.

Dolly was deeply empathetic.  Her experience growing up poor in rural Tennessee taught her to stand with those often ignored by society. As a country music performer, she loudly and proudly stood up for the LGBTQ community. When overhearing a story about a woman unable to pay her mortgage, and in danger of losing her home, she bought the house for her, gifting her the mortgage but never telling her who had purchased it for her. She spoke up for Black Lives and quietly paid for her driver’s medical and surgical needs when they transitioned. Jane Fonda called her, “the voluptuous embodiment of empathy.”  Let’s celebrate Dolly by becoming more empathetic.

And more than anything, she believed, fully, in herself. In world seemingly designed to tell us we are not enough, Dolly said, “I always knew my worth.” When Elvis wanted to buy the rights to, “I Will Always Love You,” and record it as his song. through her tears, Dolly said no thank you. Whitney validated that decision years later and millions of times (and dollars) over. Dolly built a theme park in the foothills of Appalachia. And those roller coasters are still operating, and the fried apples are worth the trip.

In an amazing life, Dolly did not achieve all the good tasks of humanity, but as Rustin told us, she never stopped trying. Let us all continue to celebrate Dolly Parton, by being more Dolly. We will sincerely be a better world when we do.